The Waterfall

I once went hiking with my wife and a girl who was then our sometimes lover and happened upon a waterfall. Kids were jumping off the cliff into a rocky pool of water below. We weren't going to jump, but I looked back, and something in me told me I had to. I stripped to my bra and went up to the ledge. I almost turned back, but the boy behind me told the girls with him "you can do it, look, she's doing it" so I had to then, so I did.

The second my feet left the edge my first thought was "I regret this" but it was too late. I was in the air. I had to follow through. I hit the water, my heart pounding, my breath seizing in my chest, and it was cold and it was hard and I wasn't exactly happy that I'd done it but it was an experience for my file.

Today I got into a war on twitter, which I wish I hadn't done, but I stand by what I said. I don't have to fight your fight, and I don't have to hire or fuck you, and porn is maybe art and maybe smut and maybe corporate trash...but neither porn nor sex is a civil right. I am proud of who I am, and of my work, but you don't have to like me or it. If you want change in porn (or in anything else) then make it, but why attack a fellow artist for not being interested in your subject of choice? I don't belong to anyone but myself.

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